“Insanity is hereditary. You can catch it from your kids.”

 

Happy Thursday, everyone!  For more participants be sure to visit Thursday Thirteen.

Today would be Erma Bombeck’s birthday.  She was born February 21, 1927 and died April 22, 1996. The newspaper columnist made us laugh at life’s idiosyncrasies for three decades through her syndicated column and her bestselling books like “If Life Is A Bowl Of Cherries, What Am I Doing In The Pits?”

1. Insanity is hereditary. You can catch it from your kids.
2. Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago.
3. Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?
4. Getting out of the hospital is a lot like resigning from a book club. You’re not out of it until the computer says you’re out of it.
5. Housework, if you do it right, will kill you.
6. When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he’s doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911.
7. If you can’t make it better, you can laugh at it.
8. It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.
9. It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else.
10. On vacations: We hit the sunny beaches where we occupy ourselves keeping the sun off our skin, the saltwater off our bodies, and the sand out of our belongings.
11. When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, “I used everything you gave me”.
12. One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child’s name and how old he or she is.
13. Seize the moment. Think of all those women on the ‘Titanic’ who waved off the dessert cart.